I am going to give this marriage a year. Not for me, for my kids. If it were not for my kids, I would have been out of here a month ago. I'll re-evaluate everything in a year. I need to finish school. I have this semester and next semester. I need to put all of my efforts into school and my kids right now.
Maybe in a year, I'll feel differently. I know I will be a different person than I am now. Because with the grace of God, I will still be sober. I will be working on my steps with my sponsor. I won't be making decisions out of anger and pain. I'll do my resentment prayers for my husband and the other woman. I'll continue my Big Book study. My decision to continue my marriage or end it will be sober, sane and rational. At least that's my plan for now, who knows what my Higher Power has planned.
Now that I've gotten out of the driver's seat, I am at peace. I'm just going to work my program and do the best that I can. I know that my Higher Power has a plan for me and I'm praying for the knowledge of His will for me.
5 comments:
... and maybe there is some truth behind the reasoning that one shouldn't make any life-changing decision in the first year of sobriety...
i wish you strength, prayers and clarity!!!
Sounds like a good plan.
Print it out and keep it where you can see it as a daily reminder.
Just listen and you will hear his will clearly.
Peace,
Scout
What dAAve said. And give time time...if you get me.
Take it easy, Clairty. And have a good week.
:-)
I have a friend who gave her marriage a year. They went from being very distant and 'together for the kids' to being very much in love and becoming business partners. It's amazing what a year can do.
And you know what? If things don't go that route, you can at least say you tried. You can tell your children you gave it a real shot. You will have had time to complete your studies and gain more sobriety. With sobriety comes clarity, insight... I think this is a win/win situation for you.
Wishing you peace, love and a beautiful 24 hours.
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