My will

I thought that when I gave my will over in my marriage, things were going to be super and everything would be just peachy. Guess what? My husband's acting hostile!! I thought he would be thrilled to have me stop telling him how I thought he should be as a father and a husband. Thankfully I called a wise woman in AA who told me that he is hostile and acting out because I have changed the basic rules of engagement in our marriage. He is trying to provoke me because that is more comfortable for him at this point.

Now I just have to continue to give my will over to my Higher Power! It's not easy, it is really really difficult to face this hostility on the home front, because it's very covert and passive. And it was suggested to me that I assure my husband of my love.

I tried doing marriage my way for about nine years and my husband and we argue about the same things and we've argued the same way. Nine years, same arguments!!! I am more than willing to try a new way. And I can rest easily, assured, serenely that I'm not in charge of everything around here. I'm not the director and my husband's not an actor in my play.

I always knew that life would get better in sobriety, I just never knew how. Now I'm starting to see how it's not just a matter of not drinking, but of staying in conscious contact with my Higher Power and living my life in a different way.

Still willing, grateful and sober.